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Is Romney Flipping For Scientology? May 1, 2007

Posted by fitsnews in 2008 Presidential Primaries.

battlefield earth


FITSNews – May 1, 2007 – Forget War & Peace, Oliver Twist, The Count of Monte Cristo, Don Quixote, The Great Gatsy or our personal favorite, Fuzzy Wuzzy Wuz A BearMitt Romney would rather read Battlefield Earth by Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard. The former Massachusetts governor and presidential candidate said so himself on TV the other day, presumably right before being “beamed” back up to the mothership with Tom Cruise.

Adding insipidy (not a real word) to insanity (real word), Romney threw in for good measure that his favorite non-fiction book was the Bible, which makes about as much sense as Jesus saying the Book of Mormon is his favorite book.

Anyway, we can just see the scene on the spaceship now – Romney and Cruise, both dressed in silver flowing robes, are staring into a giant green orb glowing brightly against a background of purple haze. Cruise is holding the orb’s remote in his hand and is critiquing Romney’s TV interview. “The Bible?!?” Cruise shouts. “What were you thinking, Glindarian Four? Your favorite book is Dianetics. Now go … and fetch me a V8.”



1. Totally Boring - May 1, 2007

Somebody please get sic(k) willie a real job. This full time blogging is making him even more of a bore than ever. No job, no clients, no girl friend anymore, no advertisers. Blog hit count in the toilet. All of that time on his hands, and this post is the best he can do. Let’s find sic(k) willie a job. Who’s with me out there?! Let’s get some ideas going! Ok? McDonalds and WalMart both do criminal history checks so his two favorite businesses can’t hire him. The Gub’ner fired him and then schotline fired him so he can’t go there. Come on loyal reader. Suggestions?

2. suggestion - May 1, 2007

Well with his background he cant carry a gun, so he can’t get a job as a cop. Not even an armed rent a cop. He might make a career as a pool boy since most people dont check the backgrounds of their pool boys. Is the Columbia sewer plant hiring? He would be right at home there and in his own element.

3. interestin' - May 2, 2007

Maybe he’s in need of a career path..

But I thought the blog was damn funny still.

Don’t let that get to your (bald) head, FITS.

4. tammy - May 2, 2007

what a package on Travolta. Who knew?

5. The Scientologist Army, no, NAVY of Mitt Romney « the gravy train - May 2, 2007

[…] read a post from South Carolina’s reigning online humorist, William “SicWillie” Folks on FITSnews concerning Former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney’s affection for Scientology.  I guess I can […]

6. More on the Scientology of Mitt Romney and McCain and Giuliani and on and on and on « the gravy train - May 3, 2007

[…] Romney “flipped” for the Scientology book…not for the reasons that my good buddy Will Folks and the stilleto mafia (that’s right I coined the term on queer as folks along with imaginary consulting firm) ranted […]

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