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John Edwards’ Wife Doesn’t Get It January 30, 2007

Posted by fitsnews in 2008 Presidential Primaries.

John Edwards House


FITSNews – January 30, 2007 – We respect the fact that Elizabeth Edwards, wife of arm-flapping presidential wanna-be John Edwards, is a cancer survivor. And hopefully she respects the fact that we’re going to make fun of her anyway.

Seriously, only the wife of a liberal class warfare antagonist whose 28,200-square-foot house (pictured above) has unleashed a mini-political firestorm would think the P.R. solution lies in giving America an energy efficiency/ social studies lesson.

First of all, this lame ass response is almost exactly the same “change your lightbulbs” drivel that somebody from the Edwards campaign molested our windshield with over the weekend – on non-recycled paper, no less. More importantly, though, it fails to explain how a rich former trial lawyer with the biggest, most expensive house in his County has the nerve to lecture anybody about the inequality of the “Two Americas.”

How does the saying go? People who live in 28,200-square-foot houses shouldn’t throw class warfare?

Or something like that.

Anyway, operating under the fatally flawed assumptions that a) we care and b) this would be a good idea even if we did, Mrs. Edwards proceeds to babble on and on about the house’s high-performance windows, solar-heated water, trash compactor and yes, their energy-efficient incandescent lightbulbs.

And apparently, it all paid off for the Edwardses:

“The day the independent inspector came to evaluate the house, we were on pins and needles while he tested our home’s energy performance. As he packed his equipment, he gave us the good news: we are an Energy-Star home!”

Really? That’s wonderful news, Mrs. Edwards. Cause we were on pins and needles, too.

Seriously. We couldn’t sleep the night before the independent energy inspector came to evaluate your 28,200-square-foot house.

Hopefully you offered him an organic cookie from a biodegradable container on his way out your draft-reducing, Energy-Star door.

Editor’s Note: Kudos to our girlfriend Laurin Manning for taking a break from posting Mitt Romney’s latest campaign flunkie hirings and giving us something with a little shazam to work with.



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