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John Edwards Is Pissing Us Off January 27, 2007

Posted by fitsnews in 2008 Presidential Primaries.
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John Edwards Lightbulb

PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE DISRUPTS OUR MORNING WITH ENVIRONMENTALLY INSENSITIVE CALL TO REPLACE OUR LIGHT BULBS

FITSNews – January 27, 2007 – As if his crazy ass, inveterate arm flapping wasn’t annoying enough, now John Edwards is interrupting our Saturday mornings with lectures about energy efficiency. Thanks a lot, John. Like our weekend trip to the coffee shop wasn’t stressful enough already, what with worrying about all those calories in our delicious blended Venti Mocha fraps.

Anyway, it may not have actually been John Edwards himself who did it, but when we got back to our car, sure enough stuck there on our windshield was a One Corps “National Day of Energy Action” propaganda piece paid for by John Edwards for President.

Take action now” it said, instructing us to replace our light bulbs with fluorescent bulbs, weatherize our home, fix leaky faucets, install a low-flow shower head, fully inflate our tires and and do a whole lot of other things that sounded eerily reminiscent of work.

Furthermore, Edwards’ flyer told us that we should buy organic food only and shop at the grocery store using canvas bags instead of paper or plastic.

“Today I’m asking you to join with thousands of One Corps members across the country and be patriotic – make a difference in how you and your community use energy,” the flyer said.

Well, today we’re asking Mr. Friggin’ Environmentalist not to clutter our damn windshield with a propaganda piece demanding that we use 100% post consumer recycled paper – especially if the propaganda piece itself isn’t printed on 100% post consumer recycled paper (which Edwards “National Day of Energy Action” flyer wasn’t).

Smooth move, One Corps.

Oh, we’re also asking former Senator Edwards (his environmentally insensitive flyer would have you believe he’s still one) to shut what they call the f*ck up.

If you’ve got a problem with our light bulbs, John, you’re welcome to get off your ass, run down to the hardware, buy us some of your super eco-friendly light bulbs, and come over here and change them your friggin’ self.

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