jump to navigation

There’s Something About ‘Tara’ December 21, 2006

Posted by fitsnews in Pop Culture.
trackback

tarabradshaw

EVERYWHERE WE TURN IS PROOF THAT NAME IS SYNONYMOUS WITH INCREDIBLY HOT WOMEN

FITSNews – December 21, 2006 – With all the totally pointless stuff America “researches” using federal grant money, you’d think one of these days we’d actually get some dollars appropriated to study something cool.

Like, say, determining how many blended Venti Moccha Frappucinos one could eat consecutively before spontaneously combusting.

Or tracking dopamine levels in the female brain after the purchase of a new pair of pink-jeweled glitter slingbacks (which would of course have to be followed by multiple repeat shoe purchases tests).

Or perhaps a logarithm to predict whether Cowboys WR Terrell Owens can go an entire season without spitting on anybody.

Or to digress … the question that has been driving our very own Sic Willie crazy all day long:

Why are girls named Tara so hot?

Seriously, it’s getting out of hand. And we’re not just talking about bimbettes like Tara Connor, Tara Reid, and Tara O’Connor either.

Hot Taras are popping up literally everywhere.

For example, just to see what would happen, we typed the name “Tara” into a random blog search engine. The first thing that came up was a website called When Tara Met Blog.

Surprise … she’s totally hot.

And totally smart, too. Reading her blog we discovered that “Tara” means “Star” in Hindu and that there are over 160,000 people in America named “Tara.” We also learned that she likes Starbucks, Stevie Wonder and helping out underprivileged children – just like us! Then she totally kept it real by calling out Tara Reid and Tara Connor as “skanks,” at which point we basically decided that this girl is our new hero.

Next in our effort to get to the bottom of all this Tara-ness, we decided to call upon our friend Tara Bradshaw in Washington, D.C.

Surprise again … she too is totally hot (seriously, just look at the picture above) and totally smart, too.

Tara is a lobbyist for Washington Council Ernst & Young, which we think is one of those companies that basically runs the world. Before that she was a spokeswoman over at Treasury – as in the U.S. Department of the Treasury. You know, the people who print our money and stuff and run the Secret Service.

Tara has a dog named Maggie, a pink Bluetooth (to go with her pink Razor), she likes Law and Order, Gatorade, reviving the lost art of entertaining and she is an amazing hostess and cook. Like, Hello!

Tara may also be our key to getting the funding we need, seeing as she is a kick-ass federal lobbyist and all.

Look, if the federal government is going to keep cutting seven-figure checks every time a group of Sociologists gathers ‘round the bong over the weekend and decides to invent another “–ism,” we should at least set something aside for real research.

Advertisements

Comments»

1. Tara - December 22, 2006

Wow, who knew my latest blog post would be talked about elsewhere and in SC? thanks for the compliment and am glad you think I have a hot name and share the Stevie, charity and Starbucks love. I used to want to be called by my middle name actually, Renee, when I was growing up, but now I do like Tara. After all, how many people can say their is a Goddess by the same name? 😉

happy blogging!

2. Emily - December 22, 2006

Reading random girls’ blogs on the internet got you in trouble last time, did it not?

3. Shannon - December 22, 2006

And here I can say that I knew Tara when! Just look at you making a blog from my neck of the woods. Gotta love it!

4. James - January 22, 2007

Whoa! That Tara Bradsahaw is stunning. I’ve got to move to DC!

5. Steve - April 30, 2007

Wow, Tara from Tarametblog.com is **HOT**

6. Mike - October 30, 2007

Agree on Tara Bradshaw. She must make a ton of money working for Ernst and Young. That’s one hot sugar momma!

7. James - November 2, 2007

Ha!! Good point Mike. She brings home the bacon and cooks it too! Unfortunately, women like that are born with boyfriends.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: